"hope is here"

i am really, really tired. physically and emotionally. and for some of you i've expressed this privately via emails, but i guess if this blog is supposed to accurately depict my entire time in ghana, the bad must go with the good.

first, gillian is still not feeling well. we made another hospital visit tonight. they are going to run extensive tests to finally get to the bottom of all this. she is staying overnight, which i think is the best call. julia (our RA) and i will go back to the hospital early (like 5 am) in the morning to be with her as she gets more tests done. which means i really should be sleeping right now, but what's new.

at the hospital right before i was going to leave, gillian got a phone call from our associate director, krista, who was just checking up on her. she told krista i was about to leave as "hope is here." what she meant was hope, our night driver, is here to pick me up, but i interpreted that a totally different way. hope is here. part of romans 12 says, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."

this verse really has hit me for a few reasons. a) joyful in hope. i have hope in a lot of things right now. hope that gillian will get better. hope that our time here will be/has been/is fruitful. hope in the future. hope in love. hope in humanity. b) patient in affliction. boy, couldn't have said it better myself. every night and every day, in my journal, in my head, and with gillian, i pray for patience. patience with the people here, patience with myself, patience with time. patience when i am most frustrated with ghana. c) faithful in prayer. i think god has really, really put prayer on my heart since morocco. the staff at the village of hope does prayer walks daily, where they walk around the voh campus, stopping at various houses or the school or the fences that border off the village and say a prayer for each location, and for the sustenance each place/location/venue will bring to the village. i think this had a profound effect on me, and i have really really been not only dedicated to, but moved to and want to, pray continually. since morocco, gillian and i have (tried to) pray every night together before she goes to bed. i find myself asking for prayer and praying for people much more frequently. and when i say i'm praying for you, please know i mean it. anyway, all that being said, i delight in being faithful in prayer. i just want to share that with you, praise god. but this verse above, in general, sums up what i think should be our ghana motto from here on out. i am trying.

for my sake, i am listing a few things on my list of things to pray about that i keep in my journal. some are totally stream of consciousness and 1 time deals, others we (gillian and i) pray about daily. if you are inclined, feel free to pray for these things too. i think honesty in our wants, desires and requests are imperative. and if we are to do as those verses say, let us be devoted to one another in brotherly (or sisterly) love.

here goes: for the safety, protection and happiness of our friends, family and loved ones in texas, seattle, new york and florida. for our navigators family. for the kids/staff/spirit of the village of hope. for ourselves- patience, joy, humility. for our friendship (mine and gillian's). for our friends here in ghana. for our relationships with our friends at home and in new york, that they may be just as strong when we return as they were when we left. for health, specifically for gillian's physical healing and peace of mind. for our hearts. for the future. for ghana and the people of ghana.

the list could/does go on quite a bit more, but this is enough for the world wide web.

i am heading to bed, as i have to wake up in 5 hours.

love love love

edit: this was written last night, before my internet went out. and before i spent the rest of the night puking my guts out (don’t have the slightest idea why). welcome to africa.